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Eat Fresh!

G. Gen, team, humor. For Katie M., from a challege based on this icon.

Disclaimer: These people do not belong to me and I am not making any money off of them.

“We’re doomed,” Colonel O’Neill said as they walked.

“You know,” Daniel said, “it’s really not Sam’s fault that her pack –”

Doomed, Daniel.”

Sam rolled her eyes. “Have another protein bar, sir.” She avoided a rock in her path and signaled Daniel to do the same.

“Things taste like cardboard.”

“And you’ve been eating them for decades,” Daniel pointed out.

“Never explore space without a decent lunch, I always say.”

“You have never said that, O’Neill,” Teal’c said from behind Daniel.

“Sure I have! You just don’t listen.”

Normally, Sam would appreciate the colonel’s attempt to distract them from their misery. But they were all wet and cold, she was hungry, she’d lost another laptop in the river, and her shoulder hurt like hell. She just might have lost her objectivity.

“I will buy you another sandwich upon our return, O’Neill,” Teal’c said. Even he sounded testy.

It was Teal’c who’d left the base half an hour before their scheduled departure, and returned with four foot-longs from Subway. “I grow weary of the sustenance provided by your military,” he’d said. Somehow Sam had ended up with them in her pack, and Colonel O’Neill had spent the rest of the morning gazing at it lovingly.

“I was looking forward to those meatballs, you know,” he said as he scrabbled over a small outcropping.

“Yes, sir. We all remember.”

He glanced at her over his shoulder, eyebrow raised at her tone, but he didn’t take the hint. Oh, no.

“Meatballs, sauce, cheese …”

“Oh, now that’s just mean,” Daniel said. Sam silently agreed.

“If we don’t starve before we get home –”

“Oh my god,” Sam said. She stopped walking and Daniel nearly plowed into her back. “We’re two hours from the gate. I’ll buy you a dozen sandwiches and clean your refrigerator if you’ll just shut up.” She paused, watching the colonel slowly turn around. “Sir.”

His eyes danced with mirth. “Why, Carter,” he said, “are you irked?”

“If she is not,” Teal’c said, “then I believe I am.”

“Thank you, Teal’c,” Sam said.

“I think we’d all be happier if you’d cut it out, Jack,” Daniel said.

The colonel smirked and walked past them, towards the gate. “What was that you got for yourself, Teal’c? Turkey with extra pickles?”


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